Laundry and Two AM Talks

Do you ever wake up in the middle of the night...toss and turn...but just can't go back to sleep?  I do.  Between the hours of two and three AM tend to be my usual time where I find myself awake...exhausted...but still chasing sleep.

After a while I usually try watching some television, reading, or checking Facebook, but after about an hour of this I tend to get up and do laundry.  I don't know about all of you but at my house there is always laundry that needs to be done.  So with this always on my brain I swing out of bed and head to my washer and dryer. 

I usually pull the clothes out of the dryer (there are always clothes in my dryer) and start a new load going.  As I drop the basket at my feet and sit on the couch I begin folding clothes...and I talk to God. 

My first question is always "Ok.  I am up.  What do You need me to hear at this time of night?"

God gets my sarcasm.  He is also patient with my grumpiness at all times but especially in the middle of the night. 

Then I just fold in silence.

And I wait. 

And I listen. 

I let my mind begin to clear away the haze of sleep and I open up both it and my heart to what God has to say to me. 

Now I have never actually "heard" God speak to me like in a Morgan Freeman kind of voice but I have "heard" God talk to my soul...if that makes sense.  Some of my best talks with God happen in the middle of the night.  Some of my hardest talks have happened with God in the middle of the night.  Some of my soul shattering, soul cleansing, soul searching talks have happened with God as I folded socks and tshirts in the middle of the night.

I rarely go back to sleep on nights like this and I often look like a zombie the next morning due to not enough sleep.  While there may be dark circles under my eyes though my soul has brightened a little.  While I may be exhausted and tired all day, my mind is at peace and can rest easier now.  While I may yawn with a wide open mouth for most of the day, my heart is now wide open to experience all God has to offer me. 

I used to hate rolling over and checking the time on my phone just to see two-something AM lit up in bright numbers.  Now I don't hate it so much.  I give God the opening.  If He wants to chat me up for a while then two-something AM is as good a time as any.  However, if He doesn't really have much to say then I don't mind rolling back over and going to sleep too.  I just let the Big Guy make the call.

So if you see me today and I look a little tired or a little rough around the edges just know I am lacking sleep...but what I lost in sleep I gained in insight, wisdom and love from one of those two AM talks with God.  Give me some room to be grumpy today...after all I am no saint...I still need my sleep!!!